It is work... It is work to close ones mouth when there is oh so much that could be said...
It is work to take a deep breathe and let it out before addressing another human being when all you want to do is take that human being's head and shake some sense into it... (ok my pre teen )
It is work to put down that which you want to do and pay attention to another's needs...
It is work to sit and read the same book over and over again with out skipping words or pages... come on I know I am not the only one who does this...
It is work to be patient, kind, humble .....
You know when it is the most work... don't you?
For me it isn't when I think back to the times when I was out and ministering. It wasn't the times when I was with my friends.
It is the day in and day out ... minute to minute .... loving a 10 month old (ok .. she is easy), a 3 year old (oh .. there are times.... there are times ), my first daughter who has reached a very new stage that I am trying to understand... all I can say is she makes the older boys look a cake walk... and the list goes up and on.... Three older boys... with different needs, wants, personalities... etc etc etc... and on top of them my absolutely fabulous husband who ( I know this is very hard to believe) isn't always absolutely fabulous... ok maybe 99.9999% of the time but you know that .0001 percent is what really gets you.... well, and then there is the dog....
What is it that I am confessing..... Is it just me?
Well if it is then it is a true confession.... it is easier to love those that you aren't around all the time... we are more cordial at times to the stranger passing on the street then we are to those that we live with... at least I am .... hopefully I can use the past tense word "was" some day soon...
This experiment only in its 6th day is holding me accountable.. I think more before I say something... I take deep breathes before addressing the child who has left the task undone although asked to do it .. oh probably at least 10 times... I think how can I show them love... patience, kindness and most of all self - control... I am thinking more about every action and every word..... It is work.....
Isn't it funny that when we tell our children to stop screaming we are usually screaming ourselves....
I am bringing these lessons home..... and I am finding that I am kinder... if I take that moment to think about it... I chose my husband as the man I will live all my days with.. we chose to have 6 kids... those were our choices.... and why wouldn't I want our days to be the best days they could be... filled with joy and laughter and kindness and wonderment and peace...... I think I just didn't take the time as much before to pause.. .to hesitate... to think before I spoke or acted.... saying I was tired or annoyed.... allowing myself excuses....
I am really enjoying this experiment.... it is hard work... but it is the best kind of work... and I am seeing that God is more into all the details of life.. more than I ever knew before....
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