Intentionality is Like a Dream Come True

Day 22.....

Three weeks have come and gone. With them possibly one of the most crazy times of the year ... the holidays and friends and family and all the hoopla that goes into making those days really special.... I can't think back to a recent time in my life where a series of weeks has brought so much personal change.... except for the births of my children these three weeks have stood out, well maybe as a birth in its own right ....

I also can't think of a period in my life, where without outside influences I have so purposefully lived an intentionally focused moment to moment existence. When I have found myself drifting into a glazy eyed moment I have for the most part pulled myself up with the thoughts of deliberate action or prayer.....

The results are still forming and as one who is always so quick to jump to conclusions I am waiting on that this time.... time is the key factor of this season and I just am embracing the moments with excitement and joy..... I see a me emerging that I haven't known and there just aren't the words to express all of that right now......

I guess what happened in the beginning was a train of thoughts that went something like this... I am 38 years old, I am the mother of 6 kids, I have all the duties and responsibilities that go along with that... and my youngest two won't be in school for another few years... and so... well... I guessed there were seasons out there for me but not just yet....... I have never been more wrong.. ok maybe I have been more wrong but boy was I soon to be shocked awake by the new horizons that were before me......

Don't get me wrong as early as just yesterday I woke up with thoughts that go something like; "What am I crazy? What am I doing? Can I really achieve all that is on my heart? Is this just some crazy notion?" The voice of doubt and the weight of fear met me as I woke up yesterday...... I got up and they still followed me around for a good portion of the early morning... Instead of succumbing to them I pulled myself together and declared that emotion was not the key factor of this time in my life instead purposeful, deliberate action and choices took that place and I was going to change the atmosphere of the day.........

Guess what? It happened! Bit by bit throughout the day I moved forward and though quite tired at the end of it I felt triumphant..... Instead of allowing the thoughts of self doubt to declare their conquest I picked myself up... wrote down some of my goals for the day and accomplished more of them then I thought possible......... I made phone calls, wrote emails, and began to pursue a few projects that are on my heart... ( more about those later).... As the thoughts of possible rejection came I only pushed through even more.... more phone calls and more emails... more questions ....... and by the end of the day I had received some emails back and more contacts were made and a process of newness continues......