I woke up and felt like I was suffocating....
Yet He was there.. not as immediately felt as I would have desired but He was there..... "you must write this" He said....
I have a daughter who is eleven and my goodness I know what "tween" years are like... one day a child... a happy as a lark... playing... laughing... swinging on swings... (uhm forget day here and put moment) the next there is weeping and roller coaster emotions and which outfit looks better and do these earrings go and the list goes on and on....
I did I woke up feeling like I was suffocating and knowing that the Lord wanted me to write but having nothing... having nothing.. I would consider myself a good writer... but have learned oh how much that truly depends on seeing pictures and hearing and feeling promptings.....
So laying there in bed hoping that the day wasn't going to be about fighting through all those emotions that were leaping and abounding upon me... I cried out and truly this was immediate... aaaahhhh that is our God.... Father no side note here you are thoroughly amazing and beautiful...
What I saw was the scene from the movie, Hook, in the scene Peter Banning is having an argument with his son, Jack.... This is the quote they are on a plane heading to England and the dad, Peter, who is terrified of flying has missed a baseball game of his son's.....
Peter Banning: Jack, my word is my bond.
Jack: Yeah, junk bonds!
[he hits the ceiling door in the plane with his ball, and causes the oxygen masks to drop down and scare Peter half to death]
Peter Banning: What in the hell's the matter with you? When are you gonna stop acting like a child?
Jack: [laughs] I am a child.
Peter Banning: Grow up.
That was the scene that ran through my head as I cried out to the Lord.. and He then spoke so Kingly.. with such the compassion and authority every human being wants to hear in a father....
"I am not like that..., please go and write...."
There are two verses that play upon my heart.... there is a pathway to life and it is to regard life and walking out our days according to the spirit ... according to the ways of our Kingdom... according to the ways of our truest citizenship....
1 Corinthians 13:11 (nasb) states... When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I
reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.
1 Corinthians 3:1-2 (nasb) And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual men, but as to men of flesh, as to infants in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food; for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able, for you are still fleshly. For since there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not fleshly, and are you not walking like mere men? For when one says, “I am of Paul,” and another, “I am of Apollos,” are you not mere men?
When I was a child... I spoke... I thought... I reasoned.... as a child.... A friend of ours has a teaching entitled The Heart of The Matter... In that teaching, Rick Sizemore, goes into the heart of Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit... In that teaching Rick also talks about the heart of the orphan.. the heart of the slave.. the heart of the servant.... the heart of a child and the heart of a mature son and daughter... It has been life for me and here is why.....
In this season and as I watch, travel, and talk to others I hear this theme... not so much about the heart of the orphan, slave, servant.. although those are there.. but the battle right now in the spirit.. the battle is that our Father desires mature sons and daughters and there are way too many areas where we are satisfied to remain children...
Now He is in no way shape or form like Peter Banning... He isn't missing important events in our lives and He isn't screaming at us to grow up... but He is wooing us in the spirit.... wooing and calling and desiring...
What does this look like.... well it is as Paul wrote in Corinthians... It is the desire that we could be spoken to like spiritual people but we regard the flesh and fleshly ways as to where we want to walk.. in the way we regard our lives and the lives of others... we would rather wear the flesh then put it off....
What... Colossians 3:5-15
Therefore consider the members of your earthly body as dead to immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed, which amounts to idolatry. For it is because of these things that the wrath of God will come upon the sons of disobedience, and in them you also once walked, when you were living in them. But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created him— a renewal in which there is no distinction between Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave and freeman, but Christ is all, and in all.
So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.
I will write more next blog about the journey that I have been walking through in this arena.. and get really personal... .. if you have had or have known a child in the "tween" years you know this it isn't the easiest of journies.. but our Father who is so very full of compassion is yearning for us to step towards maturity and as we step.. He sweeps us up and carries us along... Our eyes and hearts on Him not on circumstances or ourselves...
Yes I will write what this last season has been because in those words not just in a concept presented will you be able to grab a hold of Father as He is grabbing a hold of you..... This is what this season in the spirit it is... It is a hunger that Father as placed in the spirit calling out to us all to be mature sons and daughters...
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