It isn't about sexy language................. The story of four men and a mother

Today I have thought about four men.

Today I have thought about four men and one mother.

No not my four sons....

Not me...

Here are two men and the mother... Matthew 20:20-22

Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came to Jesus with her sons, bowing down and making a request of Him.And He said to her, "What do you wish?" She said to Him, "Command that in Your kingdom these two sons of mine may sit one on Your right and one on Your left." But Jesus answered, "You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?" They said to Him, "We are able."

Here are two other men....

Luke 23:39-43

One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

So much conversation about position, place.. title... entitlement... what can one who serves the Kingdom own, what can one who serves the kingdom do... Who gets to stand on Jesus' left and right?  That is always the question.. Who gets to stand on the right and left?  Who gets what?  Those are the questions when the ways of the world fill the heart, the mind.. the person.

Jesus having equality with God did not consider equality with God something to be grasped but laid His life down as a servant...  

I have more pharisee in me at times than I do publican, than I do Holy Spirit...  appearance of righteousness and yet darkness living within my heart... There are seats that are always going to look more desirable.. There are paths that look great but only lead to destruction. 

Here is the most excellent of ways.. Love...

The mother if she knew what she would be asking would she have wanted her sons on Jesus' left and right....  Certainly not on the day that He died for our right to enter the kingdom...

There are no sexy words .. no phrases that hold the depths of truths of our Father's heart..

Tonight there are more questions, than answers... tonight there is more silence than words...

Tonight there is a lot of thinking of one mother's request and four men...

There is a set Kingdom... Not open for discussion nor interpretation.. It's most excellent way is love.. This world and all that is within it is passing away but Him, He and His kingdom will reign forever and ever...

Tonight I fall back towards the faith of a child and I look upward and I proclaim.. God is good.. God is faithful... And God is love....

I come from Laughter... October 21

During our Going Live session through Stir The Water.. We did this exercise together...

Write down:  Psalm 63:8  My soul clings to You..

Practice Lectio Divina using that phrase and scripture... (See article below)

Realize where you do cling to Him.. Realize where you don't...  Journal.

Psalm 139
For You formed my inward parts;
You wove me in my mother’s womb.
I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.

Does your soul know it well? Where does it? Where doesn't it? Journal

“Always be on the lookout for the presence of wonder.”

 ~E.B. White

What I shared in our morning time together was about finding that place of wonder and the truth of wonderfully made in you.. I shared how I created a moment of wonder simply on the way to the bus stop this morning when walking with our 4 and 7 year olds I knelt down and looked them in the eyes and blew out breath into the cold morning air so that "smoke" would emerge.  Did I feel like making an extra special moment for them?  NO.. I was cold, and tired and had a lot on my mind. BUT in capturing that moment I created a moment of wonder for them and then in so doing created a moment of wonderment for me in the enjoyment and the laughter...

We will be posting the session for this morning soon....  There is an opportunity to grow into understanding of how wonderfully and fearfully you are made and how in each season of life whatever the circumstances or situations are that we find ourselves within .. We can cling to Him and He will uphold us... Learning to find that in the moment to moment aspect of our lives are so fundamentally important...

Be blessed upon your journey ...  Look for the posting from today's Going Live Session... (October 21, 2013

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Lectio divina is a slow, contemplative praying of the Scriptures. Time set aside in a special way for lectio divina enables us to discover in our daily life an underlying spiritual rhythm. Within this rhythm, we discover an increasing ability to offer more of ourselves and our relationships to the Father, and to accept the embrace that God is continuously extending to us in the person of his son, Jesus Christ.

Very often our concerns, our relationships, our hopes and aspirations, naturally intertwine with our meditations on the Scriptures. We can attend "with the ear of our hearts" to our own memories, listening for God's presence in the events of our lives. We experience Christ reaching out to us through our own memories. Our own personal story becomes salvation history.

How to Practice Lectio Divina 

Choose a text of the Scriptures that you wish to pray. Many Christians use in their daily lectio divina one of the readings from the eucharistic liturgy for the day (find the readings here); others prefer to slowly work through a particular book of the Bible. It makes no difference which text is chosen, as long as one has no set goal of "covering" a certain amount of text. The amount of text covered is in God's hands, not yours.

Place yourself in a comfortable position and allow yourself to become silent. Some Christians focus for a few moments on their breathing; others have a beloved "prayer word" or "prayer phrase" they gently recite.. For some, the practice known as "centering prayer" makes a good, brief introduction to lectio divina. Use whatever method is best for you and allow yourself to enjoy silence for a few moments.

Turn to the text and read it slowly, gently. Savor each portion of the reading, constantly listening for the "still, small voice" of a word or phrase that somehow says, "I am for you today." Do not expect lightning or ecstasies. In lectio divina, God is teaching us to listen to him, to seek him in silence. He does not reach out and grab us; rather, he gently invites us ever more deeply into his presence.

Take the word or phrase into yourself. Memorize it and slowly repeat it to yourself, allowing it to interact with your inner world of concerns, memories, and ideas. Do not be afraid of distractions. Memories or thoughts are simply parts of yourself that, when they rise up during lectio divina, are asking to be given to God along with the rest of your inner self. Allow this inner pondering, this rumination, to invite you into dialogue with God.

Speak to God. Whether you use words, ideas, or images--or all three--is not important. Interact with God as you would with one who you know loves and accepts you. And give to him what you have discovered during your experience of meditation. Experience God by using the word or phrase he has given you as a means of blessing and of transforming the ideas and memories that your reflection on his word has awakened. Give to God what you have found within your heart.

Rest in God's embrace. And when he invites you to return to your contemplation of his word or to your inner dialogue with him, do so. Learn to use words when words are helpful, and to let go of words when they no longer are necessary. Rejoice in the knowledge that God is with you in both words and silence, in spiritual activity and inner receptivity.

Sometimes in lectio divina, you may return several times to the printed text, either to savor the literary context of the word or phrase that God has given or to seek a new word or phrase to ponder. At other times, only a single word or phrase will fill the whole time set aside for lectio divina. It is not necessary to assess anxiously the quality of your lectio divina, as if you were "performing" or seeking some goal. Lectio divina has no goal other than that of being in the presence of God by praying the Scriptures.               This article written by:  Father Luke Dysinger

Ezekiel and the dancing of light and color and life.................

Laying upon my bed I saw pictures of circular stain glass windows... I felt the invitation to behold the beauty of light and color melding and colliding and creating a visual symphony.  Worship music played .. The words proclaiming the promises that He brings restoration for my soul filled out the air... I began to wish that I had a stain glass that I could run my fingers upon... that I could look through and hold.

Light...  Light dancing with color.. dancing with the warmth of the sun ... color, light, warmth...........

Appreciating beauty...

Appreciating simple pleasures...

I turned to Ezekiel's visions of dry bones.. and read further along in the chapter... Verse 14 of Chapter 37; "I will put My Spirit within you and you will come to life, and I will place you on your own land.  Then you will know that I, the Lord, have spoken and done it," declares the Lord."

He puts  His spirit within me.. To bring me to life...  to place me in my own land.. to empower and equip me to know that He has spoken it and He has done it....  That He has declared it...  He speaks and He does.. I need that... I need to just sit and behold the dance of light and color.. I need to just feel the warmth of light and the heat of it upon my person...  I need to know that He speaks and He does and He declares....

I can rest in Him

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LcyQOLVS_U


Worship Him ... Worship and adore Him...

He takes our pain

He calls us by a new name

He takes our shame

In its place He give us joy...

Light beams... Color.. Dazzling displays of a passionate love that knows no boundaries and goes on and on forever more... Gentle caresses of kindness and joy from a King that rules and reigns over all things... Over me...

I come from Laughter.... October 20

Now when Daniel knew that the document was signed, he entered his house (now in his roof chamber he had windows open toward Jerusalem); and he continued kneeling on his knees three times a day, praying and giving thanks before his God, as he had been doing previously.
Daniel 6:10

When I awake, I am still with you............... Psalm 139:18

Psalm 55:17 At evening, at dawn and at noon I shall meditate and speak and make my voice heard.

Psalm 91:1

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty

He grants sleep to those He loves..... Psalm 127:2

I come from laughter... October 19

As part of the Stir The Water community, we are embarking upon lessons and times for the individual to discover and reconnect with God through creativity, meditation, and writing/ journaling prompts.

Before jumping into this time we encourage you to pause, take what I've been calling a "selah" moment.  Pause...  breath...  It is time to reflect and feel where you enter this moment from.  Be aware of yourself in this moment.  From where do you enter into this time... be kind to yourself and allow your body to settle into this moment... there is no forcing yourself into this space or time...


Prayer
Holy Spirit gently woo us into your presence. Empower us to set our heart and thoughts upon things above.

Take a moment and breath...  Try and be aware of God's kindness, His presence, His love that surrounds you always...

Focus

Where do you come from?  John 13:3  "He had come from God and was going back to God."

To answer and journal and discover the path that this question brings forth.  Where do you come from?  The truth is that before the foundations of the earth were laid we were known, we were loved, we were wanted.. we were desired.

John 10:28-30
and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. 29"My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand. 30"I and the Father are one."…

To anchor myself into that truth as I then allow myself to touch what arises when I ask again, Where do I come from?  From a past of abuse and rejection, from times of trouble or pain.. From a Kingdom of light and truth and love?  Where do I come from?
What reality is more real to me?  That of the world, of my own life, or of the Kingdom?  Listen to your heart here and see what comes forth...

Journal

Acknowledge what comes up...

Hold it before the Lord

Ask His perspective upon what you feel, hear, sense...

Journal your own prayer to Him asking to make firm to you the reality of His love and His affections and that His joy is in you and His pleasure that you walk the face of the earth can never be measured....

You come forth from laughter... from Joy... He delights in you....

Life is fragile but I am not.....

My fingers spread out across my neck and rubbed my collar bone.  An intake of breath followed by a deep sigh.  Closing my eyes, my other hand found its path across my mouth and lips and I lowered my head and rested my chin upon my own flesh.

I just sat there.

Yes, the world still had an orbit.

Yes, time still moved forward.

Yes, life still went on.

But....

In those moments I knew that things would never again be the same.  In those moments I paused and within them became a holy hush, a solemn remembrance...  a most permanent of altars.  In those moments I touched Christ's garment, beheld the infant at the temple, and partook in the outpouring of His blood.  His healing, His birth, His redemption....  It is that which I need..

Moments of where the cries of Gethsemane, the sighs of the garden overtake me and I am left alone to say, "Not my will but yours be done."

It was a phrase that came forth out of my mouth in a quiet moment with a dear friend.  "I am not fragile," I said.  Those four words rocked my insides and the confession of them changed my perspective.

Maybe it is because of the abuse I walked through, or maybe it is because of the mental illness that once plagued my mind... But upon the pronouncement of those four words I felt their truth.  I felt their truth in ways I had never felt.  "I am not fragile," I repeated them.

I breathed them in and I breathed them out and as I exhaled and inhaled I realized how much I had believed to the contrary.  Their truth was hitting me liken to a rebirth and I let those four words sink deep within me... I am not fragile....

So tonight... I saw a picture of beauty emerging from ashes.  And again I heard, "I am not fragile."  I saw so very many pictures flash through my heart and my head, within seconds I wished I was a painter not a sculpture of words.   Images after images... drift wood upon a beach, newborn babes, an elderly woman's arm, smiles, tears, a man kneeling at an altar, a chapel on a hill at dusk covered in the new day's fog.

Beauty from Ashes....  "I am not fragile."

The reality of the gospel, the reality of the passionate pursuit of God, the all consuming reality of Father's desire, Creator's hunger for creation, the reality of beauty without blemish and the facts that nothing can diminish or take from me that love... "I am not fragile."

There are tender, holy moments held within the scope of a day, a time, a life......  There are tender, holy.. private or public moments that become outrageous moments of altar building, times when earth and heaven collide and the force of our Kingdom is manifested.  There are these public or private moments whether on display for all of heaven or all of earth that are forged within our being and I do believe that the cry that emerges is the truth.. that while this life may be fragile.. the children of God are not....

It is not this way among you.... I will play the part of the fool!

It is not this way among you....

No planning

No plotting

No scurrying

It is not this way among you...

No lording over

It is not this way among you...


My heart is strong and my thoughts cohesive.  My passion direct and my longing fervent.  There are no eloquent words  accompanying this charge.  A plea,  a heart felt plea... Love one another. There is no catch phrase or current popular saying that can be spoken in some profound manner as to move you. Love one another.

It is not this way among you....

When love is patient and kind and not seeking its own it is a force... a most powerful force to be reckoned with...

Fads within the church come and go... whether it is the 20somethings, or women, or the prophetic, or prophetic worship, intercession, seeker sensitive church planting.... Fads in the church come and go...  But beyond all fads.. beyond all 5 step plans for this, or 20 ways to become better at that; there is something more real and more tangible that people are so very hungry for...

Fads in the church come and go...  Words like authentic and transparent will be replaced in the next wave by the words that will fill out the coming fads that will prevail upon the church and its people.. its consumers...

Fads in the church come and go...

It is not this way among you................


I have said it before here...

The 2002 movie, The Four Feathers, is a movie that holds my heart in so very many ways..

From the lines that speak of not walking so proudly upon the earth, to the words that declare that paths cross and friendships are forged in the strangest of places within the deserts and battlefields of life, to the declarations of what is actually fought for in the moments when it matters....

You may be lost, but you are not forgotten. For those who have traveled far, to fight in foreign lands, know that the soldier's greatest comfort is to have his friends close at hand. In the heat of battle it ceases to be an idea for which we fight. Or a flag. Rather we fight for the man on our left, and we fight for the man on our right. And when armies are scattered and the empires fall away, all that remains is the memory of those precious moments that we spent side by side. (Jack Durrance Four Feathers)

Grand gestures fall away and what remains are the small and consistent, day by day realities of friendship, affection, love... What fills out the human heart is not the momentary exhilaration accompanying some snap shot of life... It is the daily recognition of love and friendship. It is the quiet moments, the moments of laughter, the moments of small private joys beheld by the few....

In previous days it was not ever the gatherings of the hundreds but the intimate settings afterwards or before, the "moments that we spent side by side."

One of my favorite scenes that I have never written about is from early on in the movie.  When before the drama begins to truly unfold, the friends are at a formal event and they escape the pomp and circumstance to be together upon the balcony.  The three friends.....  

For them it was not about ceremony... For them it was about each other.. The journey from beginning to end is that of friendship and discovery.

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"It is not this way among you..."

Those words, Jesus expresses in addressing his disciples as they try to find their place in the group.

25But Jesus called them to Himself and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great men exercise authority over them. 26"It is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant,

In my home church in Virginia there is a lot of talk about the reality of ministry and relationship.  That is the  scripture that I keep meditating on, Matthew 20:25-26.

I've been in ministry for over two decades and in many different churches and organizations.  Where I am landing  these days as I sit and sip coffee with friends and share conversation over meals is how essential and important it is to find the path where it would be true that, "It is not this way among you."

IT IS NOT THIS WAY AMONG YOU...

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I am awakening ... My eyes are being open and my heart is becoming  stout.  I am ceasing to say that I am tired of things and speaking in longing and negativity.  I have set my heart and my eyes upon the prize for which I am called forth and I will be captivated.. and I will, with His grace, play the part of the fool and know nothing else but Christ and His love.. no .. not just His love.. His passion for me... I will play the part of the fool and stand upon His truth and within His gaze I will be lost forever more....

For in His words...  It is not this way among you... It is not our ways.. For we have looked to a better land and a place where The Servant is King of Kings and Lord of lords.