in the silence of this moment more is said than I had ever anticipated.....

A song running through my head and my heart ... brings me to a moment where I am caught up in You.... it is a game of mirror.. and I wait and I watch... You move to act I follow Your actions... You rise on this one's behalf I do the same... You open Your mouth to speak I say the words....

Watching You my eyes are glued upon You and that which You do..... I want to do all that You move to do...

In this moment there is a solemn type aspect to that which surrounds me and I tilt my head to look and to wait and to watch.....

In this moment You make Your heart known for me.... that in Your heart I am established and I can never be anything more than that which I am... Yours... I see where You are going and I lower my eyes.. heart affected... ... and yet You pull me back towards Your gaze... to let it melt into me that which You are saying....

I can never be more... nothing I can ever do will ever add anything to that which You have done... but I can be less and the solemn aspect to Your presence increases to the point that without Your very apparent grace I would crawl under the table...


I can operate in a place less than that which You have opened for me to live in....

I can be less than that which You have called me to be.... I can choose that.... I can choose the less than .. there is no condemnation in this moment.... in these moments where the thickness of Your presence settles into the room... there is only love and strength and grace alongside this very solemn and serious stance of Yours...

My affections only rise towards You... my heart only hungers to love You more.. there is no sense of performance here.. no sense of disappointment here... no sense of lack of approval here.... No.. there is nothing but Your grace and Your hunger and You.....

I can choose the more than part of the equation.. not that I become more than but in You I am more than I could have ever imagined being.... ever dreamed of... in You I become the more than....

The seriousness of these moments won't lift... so I look back up towards You and thinking of the mirror game I watch You and wonder about that which You want to say... You press into me and I am left speechless ... swallowing... eyes closed... capturing a breathe...

This isn't a game .. and within it that which He is moving forward for me to comprehend there is an aspect of rebuke.... it is a statement of fact.... and His serious nature has me a bit on the edge....

His ways leave me marveling at how He operates... through His affections He leads me to a place where I can acknowledge the depths of His affections and at the same time receive a word that could cause me to melt like an ice cube on pavement in the heat of a high Summer afternoon...

There is so much grace to move forward... so much grace to take steps towards maturity.... Those steps however have to be walked out..... Wisdom and grace are abundant... But clearly there is an aspect of this being the timing to do so......

A knowing gaze being held between us ... and the atmosphere begins to lift and change and settle ... I know that which He desires... and I am setting myself to the place that I will walk wherever He goes... and will see and do that which He does...

His most amazing nature has captivated my heart and my fingers don't need to be pried off of anything .....all that I am .. all that I have ever been... I lay at His feet and choose to follow .....

I can do no other thing but that.....

What is left is a beautiful silence ... filled with the strength of His heart... filled with the beauty of His passion.... He is my God but He serves me and He lifts me up to a better way of living by His grace....

the wonderment of this love can never be expressed.. but I am finding in this moment that it actually finds its most full expression in this silence that is lingering between us... it is a knowing.. it is a depth of understanding.... of who we are to each other... He is my God and I surrender all I am to Him... and in that He declares over me that I am more than I could even begin to understand... in the silence of this moment more is said than I had ever anticipated.....