If I were to be honest... Truly honest I have stayed in a certain place in my walk with the Lord at times because I had grown not so much comfortable but aware...
Aware of what it was I was living within and how I was functioning there... Aware as ie playing it safe....
There are times I get confronted by this truth .... I loved taking pictures... I loved fooling around with my camera and so I thought about heading into photography with more of an attitude of making it more than just fooling around.
Then I encountered how much I really didn't know... What I learned about myself was that I didn't care enough about photography to devote my time and strength into learning ...
There are times I know that I am in a place with God where I know how to operate.. I know that which I'm doing... I know Him in that place and it's safe...
But then......
There comes upon the landscape of my life a thought... A piece of Him I didn't know before.... A deeper aspect of His character and nature that He reveals and I'm left hungry and wanting....
Him... Our Kingdom these things I now find myself longing to pursue ..... I really want to know Him as He is... Experience Him as He is push into Him ... Become like Him... Abide in Him...
Unlike photography as I encounter aspects of Him that I do not know i attempt to push through and in and up... Towards Him... Not shrinking back but pushing through...
while I can possibly allow emotions to arise such as concern over will I ever understand such and such a specific aspect... I try to posture myself into the understanding that with Him there truly is no limit...
No limit .. I can know Him as much as I hunger to know Him... As much as of myself I am willing to lose... As much as of myself I'm willing to die to... I can truly know God!!! That is an amazing concept... And I have all eternity to do so
It is hard though at times... He allows me entrance into a place that I find wonderful and I want to stay there... I know how to operate within that place ... I feel strong there... Knowledgable ... Aware... And it is good and life giving and I want to stay
Yet it quickly becomes like yesterday's manna.. And the life it gave begins to turn... And I can hold onto known reputation for being good at something or even self gratification that I can feel comfortable in that arena or I can risk and trust that He truly will lead me from glory to glory and strength to strength... If I go He is faithful to let me know Him... He is faithful to lead.... He is faithful to teach me His ways.... He is faithful
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