and I knew He was passing on the "secret" of sleeping in the bow of the boat....

There are days and times I do not know where it is that I am headed ... but coming to this place and putting fingers to keys is something that brings me joy and life.... words fill the air around me and swirl together and fingers dance and leap to put them upon a screen and with eyes closed and keys clicking away I am brought into another place.....

I see a picture of myself pushing a wheelbarrow ... and in the wheelbarrow are so many things that at times the wheelbarrow looks like it is about to tip over.... and I am holding on with both hands and pushing with all my might..... when along comes the Lord and He takes a hold of the wheelbarrow with one hand and wraps His other arm around me and says, "walk with me..." "walk with me"....

I lean into Him and I am quiet.... we walk and walk and walk ... and I see all the things within the wheelbarrow come to pass..... we haven't even spoken... not one word passes between us because I was just so happy to be leaning and so full of quiet and solid delight that I didn't want to utter a syllable .....

Then He stopped and put the wheelbarrow down and just sat down right there upon the lane and motioned for me to sit next to Him..... and we sat there again in silence but I could feel the words .... I could feel them coming .... the love.. His love saturated the atmosphere ....

He declared I was His.... He then hushed me as I was about to say something ... and repeated that I was His.... He looked me in the eyes and took my chin in His hand and held my gaze completely as He said it yet again...... That I was His....

I did not belong to one thing in that wheelbarrow... not one thing owned me.. not one thing possessed me... not one thing was to capture my attentions or affections...

He looked at me and with a steadfastness and complete authority He spoke into the deepest part of my being and declared once again I was His..... and His alone..... PERIOD..... nothing else was to have my affections... nothing was to cause me to worry... nothing was to cause me to fret... nothing was to cause me to be anxious... His care and concern over me is perfect and nothing can step into that place....

And then I knew He was passing on the "secret" of sleeping in the bow of the boat... and again with purpose and deliberate strength as if He was creating something anew and His authority to speak into creation and have it be and have it be good was swirling around me..... and while it was not a scream it was most certainly a furious roar... You are mine... He declared it ... He declared it over me ... around me... through me.... and I felt His passion and His jealousy and I knew... I knew that I was being trained to see in a whole different way.... not fully understanding all that was transpiring but realizing this that His declaration over my life was truly complete....

I am His..... I am His and His alone and He cares for me.... one plus one equals two.... He cares for me plus I need not be anxious equals life....

I see that which attempts to mold us and fashion us other than that fact and as we backed away from that moment... from the wheelbarrow... from the roar... He looked at me and smiled.... and we locked our gaze and all was right and beautiful....

I am my Father's daughter... I am my savior's beloved... I am so much more than I would have ever hoped or desired.... I am His.... and nothing ever gets to touch that fact and nothing ever gets to alter it....